Monday, January 15, 2018

Diversity and fitting in

Today is Martin Luther King, Jr., Day—a great time to think about diversity and creating a bigger table. I love that image of a larger table and the idea of setting a place for all who show up.

I'm bothered by what seems to be a growing attitude of who's in and who's out. Unfortunately, it recalls for me the painful days of grade school when girls were so cliquish. One day, I'd be in and someone else would be out. A few days later, I might be out and that girl would be in. It was painful. That behavior occurred in high school, too. In fact, as I reflect back, there was plenty of it even in the workplace! That behavior isn't confined to children concerned about acceptance and how they fit in. Apparently, such fears follow us all the way into adulthood.

Do you still worry about your place within a group? Or within your own family, perhaps? If you do, this might be something you'd like to work on. I like the thinking of researcher and author Brené Brown, who says she doesn't negotiate her self-worth with anyone. It took her years to feel her own worth, she says, and she's not giving that up just because someone or other doesn't like her or approve of her. Yes!

Once secure in your own worth, you will be far more likely to spread the table for everyone. You'll no longer need to think in terms of who's in and who's out. Give it some thought today. If you'd like to have a conversation about it, I invite you to contact me for a complimentary coaching session around that topic.

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