Widen the circles

I sense a good deal of discouragement these days as the country experiences moves toward isolationism, discrimination and bigotry. I am trying mightily to resist discouragement, tempting as it is.

Our task is to keep bringing the light, showing compassion, showing up, standing up and speaking up. Albert Einstein's words are relevant here:

"A human being is a part of the whole called by us 'the universe,' a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings, as something separate from the rest—a kind of optical delusion of consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening the circle of understanding and compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty."

Yes, let's widen our circles of understanding and compassion. Let's keep reaching out—even to those who are most difficult to reach. I want us to keep encouraging each other and start a ripple effect that reaches ever further and further.

Hand in hand, together we rise

Yesterday morning I heard Senator Elizabeth Warren interviewed on a news talk show. One of the hosts was trying to get Warren to criticize Hillary Clinton, presumptive presidential nominee for the Democrats, for something about which she hasn't yet spoken out. To her credit, Warren declined to badmouth Clinton but instead said she was waiting for Clinton to declare herself a nominee and then see what sort of platform she laid out. The host continued to push Warren on the issue, but she wouldn't be goaded into negative speech.

The entire exchange brought to mind all the ways I've seen women criticize, sabotage and put down other women. It always makes me sad to see this. We need all the support and help we can get from each other to make our way past decades of discrimination and lack of opportunity. We need to encourage, not discourage, each other.

Warren's action reminded me to be careful with the words I choose, too. This doesn't mean we have to agree with everything another woman does or says. Not at all. But there are a million ways we can encourage and support one another in our endeavors. It feels so good when we do. And it feels wonderful when we get the support and encouragement from other women, too, doesn't it? I have this image of women around the globe, hand in hand, helping one another—no matter what race, creed or country we represent. Together we rise!

Encourage those around you

Yesterday I was fortunate to be part of a group of women (and a few men) who attended a brunch that was followed by a program featuring an impersonation of Zelda Fitzgerald. These programs are regularly offered by a set of shops in a nearby suburb, and each one includes a program in which someone impersonates a historical figure. Last time we got acquainted with Benedict Arnold's wife. It's a wonderful way to learn more about historical figures as those who do these impersonations spend lots of time researching the characters they play.

One of the things I learned about Zelda was that her husband, F. Scott, was threatened by her writing talents when she became more accomplished. And he regularly used her diaries for material for his own writing! What a shame. It made me think of all those whose partners or spouses hold them back because they don't want anyone to outshine them. If those who love you aren't your cheerleaders and encouragers, who will be?

It's just a good reminder to check out my life. Am I encouraging those I love? Those around me? Do I try to control anyone else? Does anyone else try to control me or hold me down? And if so, what will I do about that? Don't accept put-downs, and don't allow the discouraging voices around you to carry the day. By the same token, become an encourager yourself.

Develop courage

Earlier I blogged about the death of the courageous writer and poet Maya Angelou. She left us with many words of wisdom. One of her famous quotes deals with courage.

"One isn't necessarily born with courage, but one is born with potential. Without courage, we cannot practice any other virtue with consistency. We can't be kind, true, merciful, generous, or honest," Angelou wrote.

Each one of us is born with immense possibilities and potential. One of the traits we can choose to develop is courage—courage to speak out for what we believe. Courage to follow our dreams. Courage to love and be loved. Courage to be those things Angelou mentioned: kind, true, merciful, generous and honest.

I have also heard it said that courage doesn't indicate a lack of fear. Rather, it involves facing our fear and doing anyway that which we fear. It is a sign of hope to me that we need not be born with it. Who of us feels that we were? And who feels that she or he always shows courage? It can be developed, however. And it can be nurtured. You can nurture it in yourself. You can nurture courage in others. In fact, I've heard the word "encourage" described as "putting courage into" another person. Similarly, "discourage" is "taking courage out" or another. I like that—and I want to do more encouraging than discouraging.

What can you do today to build up your courage muscle? To encourage others?

Fill 'er up - with courage

Today I had tea with a dear friend, who is launching a business for the first time in her life. We talked about all the details that need attention when one is an entrepreneur. I shared some of my experiences in setting up my life coaching practice—as well as things I had learned from operating an advertising and marketing business many years ago. She shared some steps she’s taking to jump into this career that’s been a dream for years.

My friend and I encouraged each other in our enterprises and also talked openly about obstacles we saw. We shared the excitement and the passion we felt about our chosen paths, and we threw out ideas for facing the obstacles.

Isn’t it fun to have family and friends with whom we can share our joys and our fears? And isn’t it wonderful to encourage each other on the journey?

Encourage or discourage
Some time ago I heard a sermon in which the pastor described the two words “encourage” and “discourage.” She said that when we encourage someone, we put courage into them. When we discourage another person, we take courage out of them.

What strong images that provokes! Can’t you just picture pouring courage into someone? And siphoning courage out of them?

Take time today to encourage someone in your life. Picture yourself filling that person up with courage. Doesn’t that feel great?

And when others encourage you, accept it graciously. Take it in. Absorb it. Remember it. Feel yourself filling up with courage!