The painful experiences of our lives, if examined and processed, can become the fodder for much of our growth and transformation. If we just stuff them down and tuck them away, however, we never get the opportunity to experience the lessons that likely are embedded within the experiences.
As Sherry Ruth Anderson and Patricia Hopkins say in their book The Feminine Face of God, "If we lock away the fearful, painful experiences of our lives—the death of a loved one, a betrayal, or a passion that is not approved by society—we cut them off from their natural cycling. They are not washed by our tears. They are not exposed to the warmth of our heart or the light of our consciousness. And so these old emotions and memories can not break down to become sources of new life."
That says it all. I really don't need to expand on that. Don't be afraid to feel the hurt and pain, examine it and work with it until it can be transformed into some type of new life for you.