Friday, April 5, 2013

Open doors beckon

Alexander Graham Bell once said, "When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us."

I had that happen to me when I lost my job of 22 years. I was so shocked and hurt, so stressed out and fearful. I was focused on the lost job—the closed door—longer than I should have been. It took me a while to see hope and possibility again, to find and claim a new dream.

That said, it is important to grieve what you have lost when one door closes. You cannot move on in a healthy, unfettered way until you've named and grieved all that was lost by that closed door. By that I mean more than just the thing itself. In my case, I grieved a job loss—and I also grieved such things as loss of income, loss of work colleagues, loss of status (I hadn't realized the degree to which my work defined me), loss of connections with people all over the country and globe, and loss to my self-esteem, just to name a few. I needed to pay attention to that grief process and feel the pain before letting go.

But I did need to let go! And I needed to then focus on the open doors that were out there for me. More than one possibility loomed on the horizon. What dream did I want to pursue? What passion called my heart?

Have you had a door close recently? It might be a friendship, a job, a marriage, a volunteer opportunity—it can be anything that represents loss to you. Tend to that loss. Let go. And look for other doors opening around you. Trust me, they are out there.

I invite you to contact me if you'd like some help in seeing and opening new doors.

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