Thursday, June 25, 2015

Thinking out loud vs. inner dialogue

Yesterday I referred to a poster I'd seen on Facebook that described care for extroverts and care for introverts. I'm always fascinated by these differences in personality type. It's helpful to know what's important to each of these types when you're in a relationship with your opposite, whether as work colleagues, friends, lovers, parent-child or any other.

Because my fiancé is an introvert and I'm more of an extrovert (even though I've now moved just over the line into the category of introvert on the Myers-Briggs test), I take notice of how best to relate to the other type.

I was especially struck by one of the 12 ways to care for introverts: "Give them time to think; don't demand instant answers." Because introverts process through internal conversation and thought, that's especially important. I know it doesn't work to push John for instant decisions or responses.

On the other hand, one of the 10 ways to care for extroverts is: "Allow them to explore and talk things out." Yes! That is how we process—by talking it out with others. When I hear myself describe a situation, or when someone else comments on it, I can see solutions that I hadn't seen before. And John knows that when I throw out ideas, they may well not be the final answer to something. I'm just thinking out loud.

One isn 't bad and one, good. They're simply different ways of processing information. And it's good to know that about each other.

No comments:

Post a Comment