Tuesday, February 7, 2012

What holds you back?

Have you ever had a dream that, when you began to let it unfold and you put legs on it, you heard lots of inner voices? Critical voices. Questioning voices. And you realized they weren’t the voices of others; they were your voice. Your Inner Critic (sometimes called your inner saboteur). Often when you really dream big, the voices kick into overdrive! “Why do you think you can do that?” “You don’t have enough experience.” On and on, the voices pile on.

What are the limiting beliefs you harbor about yourself? Can you pull them out, one at a time, and examine them? Look these beliefs straight in the eye. Confront them. Let them go. Replace them.

Find the fear
Behind those voices, some type of fear exists. It’s good to drill down to learn what’s really holding you back. Fear of failure—or of success? Of criticism? Of not being loved?

Several years ago I applied and interviewed for the top management position in my workplace. My Inner Critic got right to work on me. When I had a “conversation” with her (my method of conversation is journaling, but you may have another one), I learned that she was really trying to protect me. She was aware of the criticism (sadly, especially from other women) I got when I broke a glass ceiling to assume the managing editor position, and she knew it would be hard on me to experience more of that. I’m an extremely relational person; and I’ll be honest, those criticisms did sting. That didn’t stop me from doing my job and enjoying it—and I soon tuned out the criticisms (and proved my critics wrong). But my Inner Critic was protecting me. I assured her that I would be fine, and she didn’t need to hold me back. I was ready for whatever happened.

Take a look at those limiting beliefs and those voices. Deal with them. Let them go—or reframe them. It’s time for you to soar!

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