Whether we like to admit it or not, most of us like to have the approval of others. Some of us spend a good deal of time trying to gain it. A few nearly turn themselves into pretzels doing and saying things that they might not otherwise so that they'll be liked. It's not necessarily something we outgrow, so let's not just point fingers at teens and their desire to fit in.
Think about this, though: approval of someone is really about judgment. And the judgment of others or even our self-judgment can stifle who we really are.
So perhaps instead of spending so much energy editing who we are so we're liked, we might rather consider who we are when we're our most authentic selves—and spend our energy working toward that. Let's let go of all the words and behaviors that have shaped us in an inauthentic way—even if they're our own words.
If you're not sure who your authentic, true self is—and you would like to discuss this, I invite you to contact me. It can be an exciting journey to wholeness.