Just a couple nights ago I watched a Netflix film entitled City of Joy (not to be confused with a 1992 movie by the same name). This film is a documentary chronicling stories of hope and restoration from The Democratic Republic of Congo, which has been devastated by 20 years of war and violence.
The film explains how rape is used as a tool of war (no big surprise to those of us who follow women's issues around the globe!)—but even more, how the women affected by this can find their voices and reclaim their life's purpose and strength and in the process, find joy. The film shows the first class of women to graduate from a leadership center in eastern Congo. It's called the City of Joy—a safe place founded by Dr. Denis Mukwege, 2016 Nobel Peace Prize nominee; women's rights activist Christine Schuler-Deschryver and radical feminist Eve Ensler, author of "The Vagina Monologues". These three people did amazing work with women who suffered unimaginable violence to the point where these women went on to work for change in their country.
It is absolutely beautiful to watch the women grow and become stronger—and joyful again—as the film (and their training) progresses! Above all, this is a story about resilience. It's a story about joy. It's about finding our voices, even in the face of incredible pain and sadness.
For those of us who have not experienced the ravages of war or of sexual violence, there still are lessons to learn: the importance of not remaining a victim, no matter what our experience; the value in speaking up and telling our stories and our truths; the power of reclaiming hope and joy—and so much more.
Have you found your voice? Are you using it? Are you telling your story, whatever it is? I encourage us all to do so! It's so powerful. It's also powerful to stand together with our sisters around the globe—and those brothers who support us!
Showing posts with label voice. Show all posts
Showing posts with label voice. Show all posts
Wednesday, October 17, 2018
Friday, October 27, 2017
Women finding their voices
If you've been awake at all these past few weeks, you will have heard of the "Me too" movement. When victims of movie producer Harvey Weinstein began coming forward with their stories of his sexual abuse and harassment, social media exploded. In huge numbers, women came forward with their own stories of abuse not only in Hollywood but in every career field and venue imaginable. What courage this takes!
Women began posting on their social media profiles that they had been victimized, and they encouraged others to simply put the words, "Me too" in the comment box and on their profile pages. The idea is simply to raise awareness of the prevalence of sexual harassment and assault in our society—to get women (and men, too) to raise their hands and say they have been affected. As The Atlantic put it, "There's a monumental amount of work to be done in confronting a climate of serial sexual predation—one in which women are belittled and undermined and abused and sometimes pushed out of their industries altogether. But uncovering the colossal scale of the problem is revolutionary in its own right."
The problem of sexual predation is an old one and runs deep in our society. It has been allowed to continue because of shame and secrecy. Victims are afraid to come forward because they'll be re-victimized, whether that be in the media, in the court system, by police or even by friends and family. Years ago in my life as a journalist, I interviewed dozens of victims of clergy sexual abuse. I was amazed by the number of church leaders and also church members who defended the abusive clergy and who blamed the victims. "She must've led him on." I wish I had a dollar for every time I heard that! Abuse is never all right.
It's time for all this to stop. We women are finding our voices. That is powerful! We need to support and encourage each other in this. We need to empower each other. This absolutely needs to end. Women's lives do matter. And we need to add our voices to the huge chorus being raised these days. Me too!
Women began posting on their social media profiles that they had been victimized, and they encouraged others to simply put the words, "Me too" in the comment box and on their profile pages. The idea is simply to raise awareness of the prevalence of sexual harassment and assault in our society—to get women (and men, too) to raise their hands and say they have been affected. As The Atlantic put it, "There's a monumental amount of work to be done in confronting a climate of serial sexual predation—one in which women are belittled and undermined and abused and sometimes pushed out of their industries altogether. But uncovering the colossal scale of the problem is revolutionary in its own right."
The problem of sexual predation is an old one and runs deep in our society. It has been allowed to continue because of shame and secrecy. Victims are afraid to come forward because they'll be re-victimized, whether that be in the media, in the court system, by police or even by friends and family. Years ago in my life as a journalist, I interviewed dozens of victims of clergy sexual abuse. I was amazed by the number of church leaders and also church members who defended the abusive clergy and who blamed the victims. "She must've led him on." I wish I had a dollar for every time I heard that! Abuse is never all right.
It's time for all this to stop. We women are finding our voices. That is powerful! We need to support and encourage each other in this. We need to empower each other. This absolutely needs to end. Women's lives do matter. And we need to add our voices to the huge chorus being raised these days. Me too!
Wednesday, January 25, 2017
Kudos to the truth-tellers
Are you one of those women who has found her voice in the last half of life? It happens for so many women who, raised to be "nice" and to not "rock the boat," don't feel free to speak up until a certain age—say, perhaps 50 or older.
If you're one of those, don't worry about lost time. And don't worry about offending. Sometimes the emperor simply has to be told that he has no clothes!
Truth-telling is important work, and it can be done respectfully. "Speak the truth in love." We have heard those words many times. There is a way to do it—and still say the hard words that need to be spoken. Speak from your most authentic place.
We know truth-telling isn't easy, but it's crucial. It often comes with a price tag. When you engage in such work, it's really important to surround yourself with a strong support system. You'll likely face ridicule, criticism and worse when you tell the truth—particularly so if you speak to someone with more power than you have. And it's important to engage in good self-care.
If you have words that are important to speak out, go ahead. Find your voice. Use your voice. Do it with integrity. And take your place alongside huge numbers of women going all the way back in history.
If you're one of those, don't worry about lost time. And don't worry about offending. Sometimes the emperor simply has to be told that he has no clothes!
Truth-telling is important work, and it can be done respectfully. "Speak the truth in love." We have heard those words many times. There is a way to do it—and still say the hard words that need to be spoken. Speak from your most authentic place.
We know truth-telling isn't easy, but it's crucial. It often comes with a price tag. When you engage in such work, it's really important to surround yourself with a strong support system. You'll likely face ridicule, criticism and worse when you tell the truth—particularly so if you speak to someone with more power than you have. And it's important to engage in good self-care.
If you have words that are important to speak out, go ahead. Find your voice. Use your voice. Do it with integrity. And take your place alongside huge numbers of women going all the way back in history.
Wednesday, April 8, 2015
Give voice to pain
Yesterday we talked about healing our wounds and hurts so that we don't end up hurting others because of them. Acknowledging that we have the wounds is a good starting place. Naming what is can be so powerful.
In The Book of Awakening: Having the Life You Want by Being Present to the Life You Have, Mark Nepo says: "We often underestimate the power of giving voice, but it is real and sustaining. It is the basis of all song. It is why prisoners break into song. It is why the blues are sung, even when no one is listening. It is at the heart of all hymns and mantras.
"And it works its healing, not so much by being heard as by the fact that in giving voice to what lives within, even through the softest whisper, we allow the world of spirit to soften our pain."
Yes. Give voice to your hurts, your pain, your wounds. Sing the blues! Comfort yourself. Then let the pain go. When it involves something huge like abuse or death, it's highly likely that pain will cycle around again. But each time you do some healing, you reduce the amount that resides in you. And the healing becomes easier each time.
In The Book of Awakening: Having the Life You Want by Being Present to the Life You Have, Mark Nepo says: "We often underestimate the power of giving voice, but it is real and sustaining. It is the basis of all song. It is why prisoners break into song. It is why the blues are sung, even when no one is listening. It is at the heart of all hymns and mantras.
"And it works its healing, not so much by being heard as by the fact that in giving voice to what lives within, even through the softest whisper, we allow the world of spirit to soften our pain."
Yes. Give voice to your hurts, your pain, your wounds. Sing the blues! Comfort yourself. Then let the pain go. When it involves something huge like abuse or death, it's highly likely that pain will cycle around again. But each time you do some healing, you reduce the amount that resides in you. And the healing becomes easier each time.
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