Thursday, January 24, 2013

Hope for the past

Do you steal from your present by spending time in regret over the past? Or by worrying about the future?

I frequently have to remind myself: Let go, Sonia, let go. Let go of regrets for any past experiences or behavior. And let go of obsessive worry about what tomorrow might bring!

I recently read "Thanks, Robert Frost" by poet David Ray where these words, among others, appear:

"Do you have hope for the future?
Someone asked Robert Frost toward the end.
Yes, and even for the past, he replied,
that it will turn out to have been all right
for what it was, something we can accept,
mistakes made by the selves we had to be,
not able to be, perhaps, what we wished ...."

I like that. I really like it. Hope for the past—what a fascinating concept. Yes, it's important that we let the past be what it was, let ourselves be what "we had to be" rather than what we wished we would have been. I remember at some point coming to terms with the younger Sonia and my younger former husband and forgiving them both for not being able to make their marriage work. There was no point to carrying anger either at him or at myself for something long in the past, for something that now could not be changed.

Let go. Forgive yourself. Give yourself the gift of today, fully and completely fresh and new. Savor today. Make of it what seems best to you right now. Stay awake and aware so you don't miss the opportunities embedded in today. Seize them. Keep alive your hope for the future ... and your hope for the past!


  1. Bingo!! I think learning to forgive oneself is one of the hardest things to learn ... but tremendously freeing when we begin to do so. (I think there would be less road rage if we could do this better!!) :=)

  2. Oh, yes, and perhaps less incivility as well. If we are gracious and forgiving toward ourselves, we have the wherewithal to offer that same attitude toward others. Easy to say. Tough to do. But definitely worth trying!