Thursday, May 22, 2014

Changes & control

Have you ever been so busy looking at how others around you affect your life that you forget to look inside and see what part you play in how your life is going? Yup, me, too.

It's so much easier to see how the actions of others affects our happiness or unhappiness. It is often more clear to us what impact friends and loved ones have on how we feel about ourselves and our lives. It isn't as helpful, though.

It's good to do an honest check-in to see what's going on inside us. Are you carrying around old ideas about yourself? Old baggage? Old tapes? Resentments? Is it time to do some more letting go? Do you want to reframe some of your life events to see what blessings might have been contained inside even hurtful and painful experiences? Mind you, this is hard work. It's not easy being honest. What we see isn't always so pretty!

Recently I heard a wonderful phrase that reminds me to check out my own "stuff" rather than focusing on that of others. Here's the phrase: "Keep your dipper out of my bucket." When my dipper is in your bucket, I'm not paying attention to my own issues. And when it comes right down to it, I am the only person whose life I can change. I have no control over anyone else. Influence perhaps. But no control. And the truth is, even making changes in my own life is difficult. But I surely cannot make changes for others.

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