Friday, April 13, 2012
Tend and befriend
Studies have shown that in times of stress, women respond in a
different way than men. Men tend to withdraw (or sometimes to fight)
while women engage in nurturing, befriending behavior. This concept is
often referred to as "tend and befriend" for women and "fight or flee"
for men. (And, of course, there are always exceptions.)
Generally, however, women are very good at tending to others and
befriending one another when faced with stressful situations.
The surveys and news articles about the studies point out that some
men go on a rampage when under extreme stress whereas women will turn
to others to give and receive mutual support and nurturing. Women will
nurture the family (tend) when stressed and will typically reach out
to a social group (befriend).
Do you have a good community of women to support you as you go through
change? If not, can you create one? It's so essential to get
encouragement and support when you are stressed (and even when you're
My hope is that this website, especially through this blog, can be a
place where we tend and befriend one another. I invite you to
regularly leave your comments and tips so we can learn from each other
and support each other. Thank you for that. I learn from you and value
your support, too. Each of us has wisdom to share.